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What it's like to participate in an author event

Jaclyn

To launch my debut novel, Then, Again, I scheduled a half dozen events at bookstores in Illinois, Indiana, Ohio, and Kentucky. I'm currently halfway through this mini tour, and I can say, without any hesitation, that I. Love. Doing. These. Events.


A selection of the folks at my The Book Cellar event in Chicago
A selection of the folks at my The Book Cellar event in Chicago

Talking about a novel I wrote? That I spent years of my life writing and editing and fixing and improving? That's clearly about topics I'm passionate about because you cannot spend 90,000+ words on any topic unless you're deeply passionate about it? Girl, bring it on.


But I was ... "hesitant" isn't the right word, because it implies I considered not following through or not scheduling events to begin with. "Scared" may be more accurate. I had no idea what to expect! There's a very real sense of ... "Wait, are you SURE you want to listen to ME discuss a bunch of stuff I MADE UP" It's not impostor syndrome--I'm comfortable wearing the badge of writer/author. But it's a dubiousness that folks care about what I have to say. (My goodness, that sounds terrible. Aren't we all such fragile creatures?)


After three events, with three to go (for now!), here are some of my takeaways:


  • Answering questions from the audience is the freaking coolest. At my event in Fort Wayne, a lot of folks wanted to discuss something in particular. Seeing what resonated with another person, getting to discuss fiction with someone who's really into it? UGH, bring it on.

  • So far, at all three events, my husband has kicked off the audience Q&A portion of things. That is both spectacularly sweet and deeply special to me.

  • Feeling nervous sucks. Like, a lot. I'm not an anxious person, but the night before my first event, I felt anxiety like liquid pushing all the blood from my veins and taking over my limbs. I felt something similar in the leadup to my book party, and a good friend told me, "Do a shot. It helps." I thought he was joking, but poured myself a finger or two of scotch the night before reading No. 1. He was right; it helped, a little.

  • Before reading No. 2, however, I was so chill, I took a nap in the car on the drive there. Admittedly, this was my hometown reading. I want to say I was excited, because I was, but again, I fell asleep on the car ride. I think the prevailing emotion was more "at peace" and "content."

  • Nerves came back a week ago, though considerably less than the first time. They melted away when I walked in The Book Cellar and saw so many amazing humans--my aunt and uncle, a dear college friend I haven't seen in over a decade, my cousin, a contingent from the writing retreat I took in March to India, work friends, a favorite friend, friends of friends, some faces I didn't recognize ... Y'all, I will never stop singing it loudly: I have the most spectacular community.



(click the photos to expand)


People have asked here and there, "Why are you nervous?" And I've struggled to answer that, to pinpoint a reason that I feel like I'm going to mess up. I think, perhaps, I've come up with something: My biggest, No. 1 fear related to an author event is ... What if, during the Q&A with my interlocutor, they ask me something I don't know. How embarrassing! To be interviewed about something I wrote and to forget a detail or be unsure how I did X or why I thought of Y? Yikes.


Being able to pinpoint that fear, though, helped; I'm in marketing for my day job. I do PR and have done PR in some form since 2013. And I watch people get interviewed, and I see how they handle a question they don't know or don't want to answer. And you know how they do it? They don't answer the question that's asked; they answer the question they wish they were asked.

Which, on first glance, feels deceitful. But let's be real: I'm not participating in a presidential debate. Dodging a question, for me, does not have national and global implications.


Thank goodness.

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